25/10/2014
About three years ago, my usually shy wife and I were at the wake of my wife's auntie's funeral - naturally a very sombre occasion. Early in the proceedings, I went to the gents and a middle aged chap came in. "Have you seen that gorgeous redhead?" he asked. "Isn't she absolutely beautiful?" he added.
"Yes," I replied. "She's my wife."
"My apologies - but she IS very attractive. You are a very lucky man!"
I bade my thanks and proudly returned to the bar.
My wife was wearing one of those black dresses that are merely held up by a bit of elastic around the boobs. She had no bra. About an hour later, she was getting a little bit merry after too much wine - not drunk, just merry. She started to flirt around all the men - but her dress was beginning to come down. Shortly, I could see a bit of red showing. Her dress was being held up by her protruding nipple! I started to sweat. Then she moved over to the middle aged chap I saw in the gents. Her dress was still hanging on. I walked over and joined them and we were all standing in a group with three other chaps and my wife's uncle - the husband of the deceased. We were all watching my wife's breasts wondering whether she would notice and lift her dress to spoil it all. She did. The man from the gents saw our disappointment and knew what we all wanted. He was a good talker and kept my wife chatting. He got on to the subject of dancing and my wife jiggled a bit to demonstrate some dance routine. The dress slipped down more and more. We could see a lot of red areola showing on both boobs. Everybody was entranced and I sweated even more. Then we saw that her dress was just about hanging on to her left nipple, bending it down but not quite flipping off it. I lost track of the conversation but then the man from the gents threw his arms in the air, showing his disco routine. My wife copied. Out they popped on full view to everybody. Her dress was below the bottom of her boobs. My heart was thumping. I don't know how he did it but the man from the gents kept on talking. My wife hadn't noticed - but the rest of us had, including the new widower. It seemed an eternity. I think a few more blokes joined our group for a good look. Eventually, after a very long couple of minutes, somebody coughed and said it was time to go and reluctantly I had to ask my wife to pull her dress back up. "Ooops!" she giggled - nothing more - and off we went.
I'm sure somebody must have taken some photos - it may even have been recorded on the CCTV. The venue was the Nursery Tavern, Lord Street, Coventry. If anyone has any shots then I'd love to see them. Just the memory of that day makes my heart thump. Please reply to egg@post.com
Postscript:
The funeral flash story was the TRUTH. I DARE all you lovely ladies out there to recreate the story (or variations on the same theme) where exposure would really not suit the occasion (or shouldn't). Only you must get it on film. It should be 'accidental', with a slow build up, and it must be long enough for everyone to savour and enjoy before you cover up. Good luck!